This week has been up and down... and some days I just wanna come home and have some "me" time. Make some dinner... watch a good cop show, or listen to some great musical performances, surf the web... and just chill.
One of the very present themes in my life this year is "redeeming the time". I've struggled to truly listen and be obedient to the Lord in this area when He asks for my time. I struggle to know where the balance is... when it is ok to hang out and watch a movie... or when is it ok to just do stuff "for fun" ... whether by yourself or with friends. Am I never supposed to have fun, or enjoy life? Is it God's intention that I remain so serious?
I've brought this question before the Lord...
I sometimes struggle to gain an answer when I think about those who are suffering and losing their lives for the sake of Christ just across the ocean. What fun is the preacher who is stuck in the prison cell having? Why is it ok for me for mess around on my computer for so long doing nothing... and do all this stuff ..just for the sake of fun and enjoyment?? So many who are following the Lord around the world wouldn't think so much about getting so excited for the next episode of Castle, or the 50% off sale at Express ... because their life is around Christ, and these things are not important to them.
But then there's the other side of the coin that says... "lighten up, you're too serious, it's ok to joke around a little bit"
...I grew up knowing sarcasm and joking around. I know how to joke around and I know how to have a good time, and enjoy a lot of laughs with close friends.
But I guess the question remains... Can I enjoy these things, and still redeem the time?
I find such a simple answer from the Lord.
Listen to Me, and walk before Me with an obedient heart.
I've seen so many Christians swing to one side or the other... Either incredibly serious or incredibly loose. Funny how often times it swings on both sides even in one family. I think I've been on both sides over the course of my life.
What is serious is that our Lord Jesus came and took our place, and paid the price for our very life. That we might no longer live to ourselves, but to God (Romans 6:10). And, "I have been crucified with Christ. It is no longer I who live, but Christ who lives in me" (Galations 2:20).
I do believe our Lord wants us to experience fun and laughter, and incredible times full of joy and wonder. But at the same time...I need to recognize that this life is not my own. My loving Father paid the price for me, that I might enter the joy of His kingdom, that I might know the riches of the inheritance of Christ (Ephesians 1:18). But when I answer His call, I also recognize that I am going to lean on HIS understanding in all things. And that means I need to LISTEN to His voice, and walk in the way that He prepares for me.
We can't look to another's experience and say, "they have no joy in their life, why is the Lord allowing me to have joy in mine?" or "I feel like the cross is soo heavy on me, why does Suzy sunday have the perfect life, and relationship with God and supportive family?" At the end of the book of John, the Lord asked Peter to not consider what He had in store for John, but to just "follow Me". And we are called to not look at the experiences of others to gauge our walk with the Lord... but to look always unto the Lord himself. What is He asking of you and me THIS DAY? Are we listening? Are we following?
So I've come to realize that there is no hard and fast rule about how I spend my time alone and how I spend my time with friends be it with a church group or with coworkers... all time needs to be lived before God in honesty. I need to choose to be consecrated, to be obedient, to be committed to my Lord. He may lead me through times of incredible pleasure... and he may lead me through times where I need to bite the bullet and resist all the urges to do what I want to do because He said "No" this time... and there are times where He will lead me through serious pain. It is not that I am seeking a lifestyle...but I am seeking my Lord & King, Jesus. I do not choose to be lax about everything, nor do I choose to treat every case with all seriousness and legalism, but I LEARN the voice of my King, my Savior, my Friend, and I move as He moves. Praise the Lord that we have such a privilege to be so close to Him, who is above all things, and to know His very heart & will! ...and we may come to realize that for the heart that listens, there is so much more to discover, and we may find a greater calling and purpose awaits us.
Lord, would you keep your children close to You, that we would not stray and follow our own way, but would learn to abide in You in all circumstances. Show us more of Yourself that we might know You more, and know when You say "Go" and when You say "Stay" and when You say "Just pray". We trust in Your strength to keep us, for we are weak. May our time be redeemed and be used to glorify Your Name, in Jesus' Name.
